How Do I Tell My Family That I’m Staying With My Spouse After He Cheated?

By: Katie Lersch:  It’s normal for people who love us to become outraged on our behalf when our spouse has cheated.  Many of our family and friends are every bit as hurt and shocked as we are. Often, it feels quite good to commiserate with them and to compare notes as to what an awful […]

My Spouse’s Reason For Leaving Me Is That I Always Threw The Affair In His Face

By: Katie Lersch: Many spouses initially attempt to stay together after one of them has an affair. I find that this always shocks people. There is an assumption that the discovery of an affair has an immediate and dramatic effect (and it often does.) But ending your marriage on the spot is something that few […]

If He Cheated On Me When We Were Engaged Will He Cheat On Me When Married?

By: Katie Lersch: I sometimes hear from women who are engaged and who have found out that their fiancé has cheated on them. Sometimes, this happens at the bachelor party and other times, it happens randomly, but while the engagement is active. Understandably, many of these women consider breaking off the engagement and not going through […]

My Wife Is Very Combative Toward Me After My Affair. Her Abrasive Personality Was Why I Cheated In The First Place. She’s Just Mean

By: Katie Lersch:  It’s very normal to be critical of your spouse after you’ve had an affair.  It’s human nature to want to justify your actions.  But what happens if your criticisms are really and truly justified?  What happens if these flaws are things that everyone notices?  How do you deal with them after the […]

The Other Woman Says My Husband Planned To Leave Me After The Affair / Infidelity

By: Katie Lersch: Unfortunately, many wives are faced with the other woman in the affair. Sometimes, the wife seeks her out and, other times, the other woman seeks out the wife. Ideally, it would be wonderful if the wife could shut her down before having to hear anything that she can’t get out of her […]

I Think My Spouse Had An Affair Simply To Get Power Over Me

By: Katie Lersch: I sometimes hear from people who think that their spouse was not motivated by sex, by romance, or by emotions when they had an affair.  Instead, they are pretty sure that their spouse was motivated by the quest for power.  Or, their spouse was trying to level the playing field in their […]

My Spouse Says That He Will Break Up With The Other Woman / Mistress If I Take Him Back

By: Katie Lersch: You would think that when your husband is caught cheating, he would realize that he is no position to negotiate. Ideally, he would panic at being caught, apologize profusely, vow to give you whatever you need, and walk the straight and narrow from that day forward. However, many cheating husbands try to […]

I Feel Like My Husband Is Trying To Take The Easy Way Out After His Affair

By: Katie Lersch:  Many wives who reach out to me do so because they are not getting the response that they hoped for by their cheating husbands.  Sometimes, he is reluctant to end the affair or to show much remorse.  Other times, he may unenthusiastically end the affair and promise to try to save the […]

What Am I Supposed To Say When People Ask Me Why I’m Still Married After My Husband Cheated?

By: Katie Lersch:  If you are going through the unfortunate time period after the discovery of your spouse’s affair and other people know about it, you’ve probably already realized that people have a tendency to think that you want or need their opinions and advice.  This can very annoying and hurtful.  It’s hard enough to […]

My Husband Will Not Look At Me During Sex After His Affair

By: Katie Lersch:  It’s not uncommon for sex to be a bit of a struggle after one partner discovers that the other has cheated or had an affair.  Some couples stop having sex altogether for a while.  Others carry on, but struggle.  Still others find that although the sex is occurring, it feels drastically altered […]